You have a choice to make. You have to decide, which is more important: to APPEAR successful, or to actually BE successful. Once you've decided, act accordingly.

The temptation is great to focus on what others think. The temptation is strong to "appear" successful. We want people to think we have it all together. We want our families, our friends, our peers, our industry and our clients to think we're doing well. It's pretty natural - all temptation is. It's our nature.

It's actually not bad to "appear" successful. People are attracted to successful business, it gives us confidence that our experience will go according to our expectations. The thing is, it seems that there are so many times when the temptation to "appear" successful causes us to skip over actually "being" successful.

We take short cuts. We focus on the approval of our peers. We make up stories, and convince ourselves that they are true. We worry about what people think, and do everything we can to make ourselves look like a huge success. What if instead we did everything we could to actually BE a huge success.

Full disclosure: I DO THIS ALL THE TIME. We all struggle with it, and anyone who says they don't is lying. It's why my FILTER is so important!

Here's the deal. It's such a huge waste of time. If all the energy that was spent on "looking" successful, was spent on "being" successful, imagine what your life would actually be like.

You can't pay for groceries with the appearance of success.

The appearance of success doesn't help you provide for your family.

Eventually, people figure you out. Every time.

Appearing successful doesn't pay your mortgage.

I care about what people think about me - I can't help it. I write this blog, and every time I click publish- I wonder what people will think. The truth is, my business struggles with the same things yours does. I worry about whether we'll book enough weddings. I stress over the client meeting I just had, hoping they book. I get anxious about hard to please clients. I struggle to manage our expenses so that we can make a good profit.

The bottom line is this: I work REALLY HARD to actually build a business that will support my family and our life. I work REALLY HARD to take care of my clients. I'd rather be able to do both of those things, then waste time worrying about what people "think" might be true about my business.

Here's a few other posts that cover this ground and might be interesting to you:

WHO ARE YOU TRYING TO PLEASE?

ATTENTION VS AFFECTION

YOUR CLIENTS DON'T CARE

WHAT ARE YOU BUILDING?

INTEGRITY: BE THE SAME ON THE INSIDE